Hey friends,

You might not have seen, but I recently made this video about how I’m leaving medicine forever.

In the two weeks since filming, I’ve felt a bit of a hole in my life - like I’m missing a primary badge of identity. If you’re a doctor, it’s easy for that to be your main identity, the thing that justifies your existence to other people. “I’m a doctor”.

But now that I’ve quit medicine, I’m wondering - what do I want my identity to be?

YouTuber? That feels a bit weird to me. Partly because of the circularity of my content. Most of my videos are about productivity, but my main examples are all about how I run a business that makes videos about productivity… So we get into this infinite loop, and that feels quite dissatisfying as a personal narrative.

What about Writer? That sounds more impressive, but I’m not really a writer yet. Entrepreneur? I don’t really like that word. Maybe ‘Teacher’, but that has slightly strange vibes as a label. I’ve even thought about becoming a student again, and doing an MBA.

But even if I do find some prestigious new identity, the shine might wear off again a few years down the line. Then I’d be back to square one, trying to reinvent myself.

Perhaps the real solution is to stop and ask why I feel this need for a badge of identity. Can’t I just stop and appreciate that as humans, we’re more than just labels?

Right now I’m working on trying to be OK with just being Ali. I think taking more of a “forget the noun, do the verb” approach (thanks Austin Kleon) is a good place to start; thinking of myself as someone who ‘makes videos and records podcasts’, instead of hiding behind a title like ‘Doctor’ or ‘YouTuber’. It’s all a work in progress though.

As always, thanks for reading. If you’ve got any thoughts on this, or links to articles or books or anything that you’ve found helpful on the topic, I’d love to hear from you - just hit to this email. I read all the replies even if I don't make the time to reply to many

Have a great week!

Ali xx